Where do I even Begin?

I shouldn't allow myself to watch The Bachelor prior to going to bed. I can't even fall asleep because of all the thoughts running through my head after that show. Last night was no different. I wish I had a recorder to capture all of my thoughts b/c I feel they would be much better than what I have to offer to you now.

Nonetheless, I will do my best to capture all the random thoughts I had while viewing last night's episode.

For starters, I typically like to do my nails while watching the show. There's nothing better than freshly painted nails to go with the enjoyment of watching Brad hand out his roses. Last night though, painting my nails was not even an option due to all the squirming, eye closing and cringing that was going on. Was it just me or was there a high amount of awkward moments during last night's show? I want to say it was almost as high as the very first night, and that's saying something! Anyways, between the bats in the dark, claustrophobic cage, Michelle bossing Brad around and telling him how to make decisions and Emily sabotoging this relationship, I never would have been due my nails justice! I was too busy covering my eyes for half the episode.

Okay, so let's jump on in ...
* Costa Rica is cool. The bugs were not! We too went zip-lining while we were in Costa Rica and while the actual zip-lining part was super fun, all the bugs around you, some poisonous, were not. I don't fault any one of those women who freaked out at the sight of bugs. Throwing a glass full of wine at another person, possibly.
* Chantal O. is still my favorite, due to a lack of better options. She was really, and I mean really, getting on my nerves last night. The white button-up Chantal? Seriously? There were still 8 girls left in the running at that point and whipping out the shirt and (I hope) bathing suit bottoms was too soon in my opinion.
* On a side note, this was only Grayson's second episode and he was very confused as to why I kept referring to Chantal as "Chantal O". He made the snide remark that "Chantal is not that common of a name, I really don't think you need to use her last initial." Al contrare, G-money. This season we have Chantal AND Shawntel. Only on the Bachelor!
* Where is the Chantal O. that was under the canopy beachside? I liked her, not this other annoying, drama stirring person.

* On that note, I think the producers told Michelle to go up to Brad's room and then they told Chantal (O.) what had happened which made her so adamant to figure out "who said something to Brad about not giving out a rose". At least that's what I'm telling myself b/c she was soooo annoying during that part of the show. I'm in denial that she could really be that catty. Who cares about who gave Brad flack? I didn't and sure didn't want to see her try to draw it out.
* Props to Michelle for confessing though. I personally liked her confident reply of "I'm not going to apologize" in the face of all those judgmental stares.

* The group date was cool, again Michelle was annoying as all get out! She went from one emotion to the next in no time flat. I really hope Brad sees the light sometime soon.

* Surely, Brad didn't send Jackie home b/c of her low-blow about showing special attention to Michelle? I can't see how he sent her home and kept Brit. Anyone else with me on that one? Granted, he hadn't been out with Jackie in a while so I can see where the spark may have dwindled, but I just don't get the Brit thing.
* Actually, I do. My guess is that he'll take Brit on a 1-1 next week, which will make perfect sense b/c she hasn't had one yet, but then he'll go ahead and send her home. Kind of anti-climactic for Brit, poor thing.

* Alli's date was another awkward moment on numerous levels. There would have been no way anyone would have gotten me to crawl into that cave. A) I would probably have gotten claustrophic and B) did you see all those bats? For those of you that know me, know how deathly afraid of birds I am. That would have been my date for this season, hands down. The producers would have made me conquer my fear of birds by forcing me into a cave full of them. Gross, makes me cringe even now.
* I digresse ... We felt so sorry for Allie b/c Brad was probably about halfway through the dumping portion of the evening and she had no clue! She kept saying how she agreed with him and felt so comfortable with him which is why I believe he opted to be "direct" with her. Obviously, she wasn't catching what he was throwing so he had to go for the straight forward approach. It worked. She was a sweet girl, but again I was surprised she was still around this long.

* Poor, poor Emily! While I do believe that the producers are editing and splicing scenes to give us the impression that she totally pushes Brad away next week, I do think that she won't be in the final two b/c of her tendency to "sabatoge" (sing it like Taylor Swift). Brad's whole thing last night was that he wanted to see how adventurous the women could be, and I kept trying to read her face on the group date and all I saw were signs of boredom, ie: not very adventurous. I think Brad wants to like her so much, but in the end I don't see it happening.

* My guess for the final two are Ashley H. and Chantal O. We'll see. I'm looking forward to next week's episode and I hope you are too!